(Really Sour Lemons)

Monday, February 11, 2013

One year ago today...

Happy Birthday to me!
 One year ago today... it was my birthday. I celebrated by shaving my head while Mike was at work and Celia was in school. My hair had started to fall out by the handfuls and it was time to take control and let it go on MY terms. 

Since then, I've finished my rounds of chemotherapy. I finished my year of Herceptin. On February 1st, against my doctors "recommendation," I had my chemo-port removed. I celebrated my birthday in my own skin, sans devices and deadly chemicals and full of hope for my future. What a difference a year makes! It makes my brain spin a little bit thinking about it. 

This year was a happy. birthday. Celia made me breakfast in bed. We went out for a delicious lunch a'la Italiano. Lounged around and read my book and had some nappage. Spent a few hours making some art. Had the Pineapple upside down cake Mike and Celia made (from scratch) for dinner. Mike and Celia did the laundry (seriously) all by themselves. Celia made me a beautiful zentangle-y picture of a Manga-Mermaid. (Manga-Tangle? Zen-Mangale?) And I got a new purple bicycle :-D I felt loved indeed, by all the birthday wishes from my friends and family through emails, Facebook, and phone calls. It was a very special day. 

Still not much hair but more than a year ago!
Now, on to the health update! I have to say I've been doing pretty well with the sugar ban and healthy eating. I feel like I've seriously cut my sweet tooth. I don't crave it anymore. I can pass by the candy stash at the grocery checkout without hearing their little evil voices calling to me... There's a kit kat bar laying on a shelf in the breezeway (I have NO idea why) but I haven't felt the need to snogg it down. 

German Pancake Banana Pizza?
What I am doing instead... I am eating fruit with my breakfasts, applesauce or mashed bananas on my pancakes. Chia seeds in my oatmeal. Raisins and bananas in my cereal. Super fresh organic eggs from my mom's chickens. Since I work at home I can make my lunches. Normally two or three servings of vegetables with some fish or other lean protein, sometimes brown rice or whole wheat pasta.

Brown rice, turkey sausage, carrots, parsley
Dinners are always served with more veggies than carbs. If I must have dessert, it's a chia seed pudding (not as bad as it sounds!) or jarred peaches. I go to Whole Foods every week and get fresh Broccoli and Kale and Carrots and Greens. Last week I tried Chard (easier to eat than Kale) and this week I have a huge tub of spinach in the fridge. I learned that I shouldn't "drink" my greens very often because of Thyroid issues so I cook them, which is fine. I don't have a proper juicer anyway. I made a huge pot of vegetable soup: 

Zucchini, tomatoes, parsley, celery, green beans, garlic... yum!
I am learning how to cook for myself. I can still cook for my family, but my needs are being taken care of also. What a concept. This weekend I had birthday cake, but I insisted on a recipe from scratch. No box cakes. Mike said that it really wasn't hard at all. I've been making things like buttermilk pancakes from scratch too. No big deal. I want to ban all boxed food, but in reality I will keep a few organic type foods under the following condition: I can pronounce and recognize ALL the ingredients. (I've put so many things back on the shelf while grocery shopping using this rule!)

So, how is it going, you ask? I feel good about how I am eating, but I'm not feeling much different and despite my ban on all junk foods I have not lost an ounce of weight. Now, you may say that doesn't matter, it's how I feel that matters. Sure, to a point. But my main goal here is to lose weight. Because that's the key to my getting healthy and reducing risk of cancer recurrence. I am extremely frustrated but I'm going to just keep at it. 

(On a side note that may or may not be related, my thryoid levels were rechecked after 6 weeks of synthroid and they still weren't "optimum" so my dose has been increased. I'm hoping that controlling my hypothyroidism will help. The node on my thryroid was biopsied last week and came out negative for cancer. whew.) 

So.... my plans going forward. I'm reading a lot and still researching diet and health, coming up with my own conclusions based on a lot of people's opinions. One of my goals for the next few months is to up my exercise. It's still pretty cold here, but I can figure out ways to move inside the house. My other goal is to continue to cut down on simple carbs with high glycemic loads. I don't have diabetes and I don't want to get it, this seems like a healthier way to eat. 

We'll see. I'll check back in a few weeks and let you know how it's going. IF anything is going :-D