I did it. I did something that was very difficult for me... Those first few baby steps that have opened the door and released my fears to the wind. I have proudly displayed my hair-challenged head to thousands of people. A cloudy day, I didn't need my hat and it was way too warm for a doo-rag. I went without. And tomorrow it will be easier.
I'm wondering... What did I fear? I didn't think people would laugh at me. Maybe I didn't want anyone to pity me? I don't like being the center of attention... I certainly don't think I'm ugly. Why did I insist on slipping that hat on every time I got out of the car and around other people? I still don't really know.
All I know is that I walked around a crowded tourist destination, which included a short hike along a lake and a nice lunch with my awesome kid, and the world didn't end. Kids didn't run screaming from me. As a matter of fact, a little boy named Benjamin introduced me to his newborn brother Alexander, as I was walking past his family. I engaged him in conversation for a few minutes, just wondering for a few seconds what his dad was thinking of the bald-ish chick his son was talking to.
An extraordinary amount of women looked me in the eye and smiled and said hello. Like they knew something.
I encouraged my daughter, who is into making stop motion movies with her American Girl doll, to take "Izzy" along so we could work on a photoshoot. She was embarrassed to be seen posing her doll and snapping photos of it in front of other people. What is wrong with this child? She's not embarrassed to hang out with a bald mom but doesn't want to be seen taking pictures of a doll? I tried to tell her that it doesn't matter what other people think. They'll most likely think she's cool for doing something like that. I said they would not laugh at her. But mostly to "not let your fears of what others 'might' think stop you from doing what you set out to do."
Then I thought... DUH!
Lesson learned.
We went to the beach later and I didn't wear my hat. And I'm not going to tomorrow either.
